Many today are behaving as if we have a new model of education that is causing stress, frustration, and all-around heartache. Parents, even those who are teachers, are finding they are now at home with their children and acting/speaking/writing as if this form of education is a brand new concept.
Don’t buy into this lie or fool yourself into behaving as if it is fact. This is not a brand new model of education! And because of that we do not need to panic.
Think about it this way: moms and dads have been educating their children since the day the child was able to hear. (probably as a small infant out-growing the womb). And even this first tip probably started with your child while he/she was learning in the womb.
The first tip for maintaining peace in the classroom (home) is Limit Setting.
Limit setting is done without emotion — neither negative nor positive. Limit setting is done out of necessity because without it success becomes impossible. It is accomplished when a person determines boundaries or expectations for either their own behavior or the behavior of another person so all involved thrive. As a human being, we have limits we put on ourselves as well as many that are set by others from the time we were growing in the womb.
You’ve seen or heard about it, haven’t you? An expectant mom leans over to stretch, or she pushes on her expanding belly to move the child out of ‘that spot’ – maybe she is sitting on mom’s bladder, or his foot is placed in Mom’s back and he is kicking. And the limits for this growing child are even set by someone other than Mom, as an older sister pushes Mom’s belly over so she has room to sit on Moms’ lap or the technician pushes so the ultrasound picture is clear so she can say, “It’s a girl,” or “It’s a boy.” None of these limit setting behaviors are done out of anger or frustration, joy or excitement. Instead they are done out of a deemed necessity.
Today, children are home and supposed to be learning, but maybe instead of doing what is needed, they are underfoot. If you’re working from home, with children around and bothering you – set limits with your children. The 10 minutes it takes to share these limits with your children, will save you at least 30 minutes of interruptions from your work.
If you’re working from home and need help with setting limits for new people in your office space or just need time to make dinner (or go to the bathroom, hmmm?) answer these questions to help you set limits and communicate them clearly. (Of course your answers will probably change as you work out the kinks with your children – and don’t be afraid to ask them for their input on what is working well and what isn’t, if they are old enough to engage in this way.)
Questions: (answers vary by age of children)
1. What times are you available? (If you are working from home, what are your breaks?)
2. What is an acceptable interruption from your work/focus?
3. How do you want them to get your attention if they need you? (will they quietly approach you, raise their hand and wait for you to look at them before they talk? tap you on the shoulder or leg? Scream? (in a specific situation.) Basically, what is best for your work and their need?)
I know you might be challenged thinking of answers to these questions. But the time you spend answering them will be given back to you as you are able to work and know you are caring for them at the same time. And remember – the limits are natural – you do it every day, you’re just thinking it through so you can be clear communicating them to someone else.
Next we will consider Tip 2:Consistency.
